Jordan
Jordan
“Wake up,” He said. “Sorry ‘bout that bump back there, didn’t see it comin’ ‘til I was right up on it. Do me a favor, grab that shovel when you crawl outta’ there. An’ for chrissakes stop sniveling, nothin’s gonna happen to ya if you do what you’re told.”
He motioned for The Man to get out of the trunk with his pistol and laughed as The Man bumped his head while he was pulling out the shovel. “Heh heh. Oh, sorry. That was rude of me.”
The Man looked up at him with desperation and salty tears in his eyes as he rubbed the bump forming at the base of his skull. Somewhere off in the blackness a bell sounded. 1…2…3…
“Ask not for whom the bell tolls,” He said, “it tolls for thee…hm.”
He pointed outward into the void of the night. “Start marchin’ soldier.” He had a small flashlight and used it to illuminate the steps of The Man. As they were making their way through the dark He couldn’t help but recall a verse from the family bible. Something about how God was a light unto the paths of the righteous.
And isn’t that appropriate? In this moment I am his God. His life is in my hands, I light his path and will preserve him so long as he does my will. Yes, I am God, a big fuckin’ bully with a gun to the head of my follower. And on they walked, side by side. Adam with his shovel and fig leaf suit, God with his pistol.
“That’s good,” He mumbled, “I oughta’ write that down.” These last words stung him.
“What?” The Man asked as he wiped snot and tears from his lip.
“Nothin’, keep movin’.”
—————————————————–
“How…Can I ask how far we’re going?”
“Yes you may. There’s a dried up riverbed not too far from here… Y’know, just ‘cause I’m the man with the gun doesn’t mean you can’t talk.”
The Man was silent.
“I…I don’t know what to talk about.”
“Oh that’s alright, I’m sure even Moses was a bit more speechless than he made himself out to be.”
The Man was silent. There was only the sound of crunching shrubbery beneath their shoes as He escorted The Man through the valley of shadows.
——————————————————
“Watch your step,” He said. “Don’t wanna tumble down there an’ bust your head open. That’d make quite a mess and I’d be out here all alone with no one to help me.”
“Stop it! Just stop!,” The Man exploded, no longer able to contain the maelstrom of fear building inside of him. “You talk to me like there isn’t a goddamn thing wrong. I don’t know if you’ve ever had a gun pointed at your back while, for all you know, you’re marching to your own fucking funeral, but its not very pleasant!”
He looked down at his shoes and rubbed the back of his neck as a child does when scorned by their mother.
“Look, I didn’t mean to upset you so much. I’ve been dealin’ in lead for a long time and its become the only way I know how to anymore. I thought the light conversation would relax you a little.”
“Put the fucking gun down, then I’ll relax.”
He shook his head as if driving off a bad idea, then raised his head with a stern look on his face. “Rule number 1 is never let the target think he’s got a leg to stand on. I’m afraid I’ll just have to be more firm with you.” He put the pistol to the man’s head and thumbed the hammer back, leaning in close to this face. “Now get your ass down there and dig me a hole. 6 feet by 4 by 6.”
“Oh God, I am digging my own grave aren’t I?”
“Move!” He shouted into the man’s face.
——————————————————-
Sitting in the dry dirt leaning forward on his propped up knees, the pistol hanging limply from his left hand, He began to sing in a loose melody, The Man was now almost finished with his task.
“I had jade colored eyes that shimmered in the sun / If you stared at them too long you’d catch a glimpse of what I’d done / The faces of the damned and all the butchered lambs / If I had to do it over I just would’ve done it slower / When we meet you will see I will destroy everything of beauty / When we meet then you’ll know I’ll be the axe that clears the forest.”
The Man resisted looking up at Him and continued to shed his tears into the cool, soft soil. The soil, he imagined, that would cover him soon.
——————————————————–
“That looks pretty good, you can stop,” he said. The Man straightened up and let the shovel fall over. Then he collapsed against one earthen wall, hung his head, and bawled.
“Please don’t shoot me! I don’t know who you are or what I’ve ever done to you but I’ll make it better! I’ll give you anything you want, do anything you want me to, just please don’t shoot me!”
“Tell me son, what’ve you got to live for? When I found you you were drowning in tears and booze, tellin’ your little sob story to anyone that’d listen. And I listened.”
“I….I I’ve got family, siblings, parents that would be devastated! You’d hurt so many people by killing me!”
“That’s not what I asked you goddamnit! I said what do you have to live for! You think I give a shit who gets all torn up over any man I’d kill? Fuck, I’ve left a path from here to hell of ruined lives in my wake, it ain’t nothin’ new.” They both paused for a while, catching their breath. “But I’m done with that now. Get up outta that hole.”
The Man was confused and wearily climbed up from the grave. He then walked The Man up and out the other side of the riverbed.
“Find six rocks and pile them together here.”
The Man grabbed a few rocks.
“No, good size ones.”
————————————————-
“Got an answer for me now?”
“I guess its not that I wanna live so much as I don’t wanna die. I’m afraid. I just can’t imagine not existing.”
“Oh christ, got a philosophizer on my hands do I?”
“You asked.”
“Ya. I did.”
They were both back down in the riverbed. Each of them standing on opposite ends of the grave.
“If you walk straight to those rocks from here and keep going you’ll make your way back to the town I brought you from. ‘Bout two miles out. Be sure an’ cover me up good.”
“What?” The Man asked, but He was turning away from him. He put the pistol under his chin and pulled the trigger.
His body fell backward, down in the hole.
—————————————————
“What?” Levi said. But before he could get an answer the man had turned from him and shot himself.
“Oh christ!” Levi screamed, and then again. “Oh, christ!” The sound from the sharp crack of the pistol echoed around him, thundering into the distance. He fell to his knees and wept into his hands. Wept for the life he had almost lost. Wept for the life thrown away. Wept for the final task laid before him.
————————————————
Levi shoveled the last few patches of dirt on the mound that covered his aggressor. But Levi could not help but love him just a little. The man had made him face his mortality, question his life, and then spared it even after he could not give a reason for it except that he did not want to die.
He pressed the shovel into the dirt at the head of the grave with his boot, then fashioned a crossbeam to it with some wood and weeds to make a marker. He climbed up to the other side of the riverbed and then looked back. In the distance a bell sounded. 1…2…3…
“Ask not for whom the bell tolls….” he murmured.
The clock must be busted.
So a friend recently suggested I start blogging again.
He thought I should post random thoughts I have or stories I write. I’m gonna go with stories for now.
If any of you take this and claim it as your own I will hunt you down and beat the shit out of you. (I don’t have it copywrited so a threat will have to do.)
This story is one of many short “children’s” stories that will go into a book I’m writing.
Martin the Ant.
Martin was a lonely ant and was the subject of much ridicule from his thousands of brothers and sisters because he was born missing one of his legs. As would be expected, the lack of one of his extremities made it very difficult for him to work. As a child he spent his first month learning to walk going round in circles. But as he grew older he proved to be more dedicated to his Mother than the rest of his siblings and loved them all. When foraging for food he could bring back just as much for his mother and siblings as any other ant.
Still, his siblings would continue to mock him, tucking one of their legs up against their bellies and walking in circles whenever they saw him coming. Despite his lack of connection with his Mother in his mature age he was nevertheless devoted to her and their family, always keeping hope that She would one day call all of them into her royal chamber and order them to stop mocking him.
“Martin is just as valuable, if not more, than the rest of you,” she would tell them. “He brings us just as much food as the rest of you but without the use of six legs.” But it had been years since his birth and she hadn’t so much as call him to her chambers to comfort him or offer him rest. Still, he thought, she must know my struggle and care for me. She’s just very busy running our colony.
One day as Martin was out foraging for food he was unexpectedly rolled up into the fecal sphere of a passing dung beetle. “Excuse me!” Martin cried as he was rolled up tighter and tighter into the ball. But the beetle did not hear Martin and continued rolling home to his den. For many revolutions Martin was rolled over and over in the ball, his head and body being mashed against Earth and dung giving him quite the concussion.
Eventually the beetle arrived at his den and began pulling the ball of dung apart to better fortify his home with. As the beetle began to work the last clump of his dung-mortar he discovered the dazed Martin.
“Oh! Thank the Sun you’ve found me! I’ve been stuck in this mess for so long! Now if you’ll kindly direct me back from where we’ve come I’ll be on my way and leave you to finish your work,” Martin said.
“Well now. Hold on just a second you delectable little morsel. I’ve worked up quite the appetite building up my home. What say I just give you the honor of being my afternoon snack instead?” said the beetle. This proposition greatly alarmed Martin, he had to get back to his family.
“Thank you very much for your gracious offer Beetle, but I really must be getting back to my family. They’re probably very worried about me by now.”
“Oh come now, don’t fool yourself. I’ve rolled along past your colony many times. I’ve seen how they make fun of you for your missing leg, always walking in circles when you come around. They talk of how useless you are behind your back, wishing something like this would happen so they could be rid of you for good.”
“Yes, they say those things but I know they don’t mean them. They’re my family, they love me.”
“Is that so? And when was the last time they told you so?” This question troubled Martin deeply. He could not remember a single time any of his brothers or sisters and said this to him. In fact, he could not even remember his mother telling him so. And he began to remember that as a larvae he was kept away from the rest while Mother cradled them, singing them lullabies.
“Don’t you think they would’ve sent some of your brothers and sisters to look for you by now?”
“They probably have, they just haven’t found me yet.”
“Oh stop it already. How many times have I seen you working like the rest but never receiving any credit for it? Tell me, do they give you the same cut of food for your equal work or are do you just look mal-nourished naturally?” It was true. He was always the last to eat. Never allowed to visit Mother. But hadn’t the others talked about visits? Had they been intentionally keeping him away? Why hadn’t Mother done anything? After all, she was a good ruler that knew all that went on in her colony. Hadn’t she always boasted that? The thought greatly grieved Martin and he began to cry.
“Think of all you’ve been through,” Beetle said. “All your pathetic life you’ve been pushed aside and taken advantage of for your hard work, never once receiving so much as a pat on the back. You’ve worked so hard only to be rolled up into a ball of shit and left for dead in my den.”
“You’re right,” Martin whimpered. “Release me from my Earthly duties and take me as your snack.” With this Beetle’s mouth spread in a wide, murderous smile and bit off Martin’s head, enjoying the juices that flowed from inside the crunchy exterior.
After his snack Beetle resumed his building, his hunger slated for now.
“Children, we have made a grave mistake,” She said. “We have treated Martin so terribly and he has done nothing but love us his whole life. I am just as guilty as the rest of you and so commission you all to seek him out. I will go with you for I miss my son.” And so the entire colony set out to find their Joseph. One of Martin’s brothers picked up his scent and lead the others down the trail left by Beetle, Martin, and the dung ball.
As Beetle was settling down from his long labour he heard the faint sound of thunder but was surprised to see the skies were still clear. He gazed around and in the distance spied the colony of ants. Apparently, Beetle had misjudged the colony. But no matter, he thought, I will lay in wait and tonight I will FEAST.
The colony crested the hill in the side of which lie Beetle’s den. “In here!” cried one of Martin’s sisters, “I can smell him!” They were all so excited to have found Martin that they rushed in and crowded themselves inside the den. And just as the last ant entered the den Beetle, who had burrowed himself into the wall, sprung out and rolled a large dung ball across the entrance to the den.
“I hadn’t prepared for so many guests. Look at you poor things, so crowded. No worry though, I’ve plenty of room in my stomach!” In their excitement the colony had packed themselves so tightly together that they couldn’t move. Martin’s brothers and sisters tried their best to fight off the large Beetle but were easily defeated for lack of room. Beetle carefully made his way from one end of his den to the other, biting off all the heads of the ants so as to disable them quickly.
At last he reached the end, Mother. She did not quiver in fear nor attempt to defend herself. She shed one single tear that tasted savory to Beetle as he sunk his teeth into her noble crown.
